I don't think there is anyone who does not aknowledge the efforts and the heroism of women both in everyday life and in their social struggle. There are few who do not consider women equals (at least in the "western" world) and they are declining. However, it is one thing to proclaim equality, to demand a voice, to overturn past inequalities and quite another to call a pregnancy "a woman's choice". What arrogance!
It is unfortunate that not all pregnancies are wanted or harmonious. It is horrible that so many women dread pregnancy with their abusing partner. It is equally horrible - I think - that so many women (and their partners) treat abortion as a contraceptive. All these things - and more - make us cringe but let me say this and say it loudly: A pregnancy involves at least two people. The argument "it's my uterus" is invalid and idiotic. Quite as idiotic as claiming that anything that strays in your yard is yours to do with whatever you wish. It is an insensitive position, an arrogant and one serving ulterior motives. Roe vs Wade became a flag and I understand (trust me) the importance of a flag. Arguments never rally troops, speeches only hold a fleeting sway over dissenting groups. But a flag! A standard! If your colors march ahead by god! You follow.
That having been said, you may surmise that I am "pro life" (another idiotic group with their own standards, rotting fetus corpses, blood and horror) but you would be wrong. I am pro education. I am pro sanity. I think I am a true feminist (I can see your smirks already), one that need not scream, one that need not march naked through the streets supporting some nebulous cause. Women are equals, that does not mean they are the same as men. We have different strengths and weaknesses and - I believe - we are here to complement and not antagonize each other.
So, abortion. What about it? My personal belief is that we should not have them. I do believe the fetus is a complete human being, one that lives and feels and most importantly one that has the right to existence. My quarrel with abortion is the same I have with capital punishment. We, humans, simply do not have the right, in the great scheme of things to remove a life or decide that one should not be lived. That is my personal belief. Does that mean all women who had abortions are sinners who should burn in hell? Of course not. Each case is different, I judge none and I can only hope that I won't have to face the dilemma. It is not an easy one.
Professionally and "socially" if you will, I believe abortions should be legal. Driving women (and doctors) underground, pushing women to questionable "establishments" with unsanitary conditions is not a solution. A woman who needs an abortion should be able to get one in a regular hospital in surgery-clean conditions.
Defining the "should" part though, that is the issue. First of all, I do believe an abortion should have consent from the husband. I understand that in some cases this is impossible or even dangerous - these cases could be turned over to a social worker and why not, the police. Secondly all women who choose abortion should go through a rigorous day of counselling and reflection. Women who choose abortion should be told about the procedure, what it does, what feelings it causes. They should be left to talk to others, volunteers who have had abortions. People who can describe the good and the bad. Finally I do think that women after the second abortion should get a mandatory contraception course and/or "mandatory" visits to a specialist. I am not brilliant, I don't have all the answers, but that's what I believe.
Abortion should be legal, but controlled. It is not contraception, it is not something to be taken lightly. Women (and their partners) should be educated. Let's spend some energy and money on that. But of course, education doesn't make a good banner. Not much to scream about and not much gore to show...
8 comments:
I honestly cannot believe that it seems like we are in complete agreement on this issue. How did that happen?!?
I see it is because I'm agreeing with Thanos, not Mel...sorry, guys.
Hehe, we all know better than to think you are agreeing with me! At least you got it right on NiT. =p
I have to disagree with you about the day of mandatory, "rigorous" couseling and reflection. This is a patronizing idea that suggests that women don't think about this choice at all, that stupid bitches who get abortions must be ordered to think about what they're doing. It suggests that women are children who don't consider the ramifications of their actions. Some probably don't; the majority do. If I decided to have an abortion, and was subject to a day of mandatory, rigorous conselling, I'd do the mental equivalent of sticking my fingers in my ears and shouting "la, la, la" at the indignity of it.
ZARDOZ SAYS:
Yes youre right of course
i am also pro abortion
and i support the idea
that mrs BARBARA BUSH aborts
her son even at this stage of the malignant pregnacy he has become.
and youre right of course
making moussaka in high heels
brings out something (xmm)
in the cook
MY friends thank you
my wife was ecstatic
and generally we had a great laugh
puttin the shoe on the other foot(male)
-----------------zardoz
Lol, I was posting before I saw your request Scruffy!
I agree with you Anonymous (obviously my husband and I have different opinions) although I also know that in some states the whole all day counselling thing is already in effect. Very tough for someone who knows an abortion is the right choice but has to sit through that all day.
The problem is abortion is not really a "woman's right to choose" issue.
The choice is all ours before we are pregnant. Think about it. We, as women, are defeding and even arguing for murder because we think it makes us free? If that's freedom, killing an unborn child, a human with less rights than a sea turtle egg, then we've sadl lost our way in the equal rights arena.
We lost when we thought we could be and act like men in the sexual arena. We lost vision for how we are created and who we were created to be.
Women, ABOVE ALL, should defend the weak and the unborn.
The problem now, with 53 million abortions, there are 53 million pounds of conviction and guilt.
If we change the laws or ideals now, what will we all do with the guilt?
Instead, we continue to propigate it.
Sad.
Yep, I know this was a post from 2006... But for those like me who are still reading old posts, as well as for the authors of this blog, my two cents:
Aside from Mel's arguments in her own post about why women should not be obliged to inform ANYONE before making such a decision, a couple more thoughts...
1) A pregnancy changes a WOMAN'S body - not a man's. Weight-gain might be considered a superficial first argument, but there you have it, it is happening to a woman's body, not the man's. It is also her body which will be drenched with hormones and she will be the one running the risk of post-partum imbalances afterwards. She will be the one who is ripped down there and needing stitches... It will be her vagina and her hips that will be stretched beyond their capacity. It will also be her body which will be sucked dry from nutrients and vitamins for 9 months. Noone should have a say on this choice because it is a woman's right to decide whether she wants/allows all these events and changes to take place. Simply what is required of a woman for a pregnancy to be carried out, is NOT equal to what is required of a man (genetic material - after that, his body is not taxed).
2) Aside from how physically taxing and the time commitment it requries, a pregnancy also brings other changes for a woman. It changes her economic/professional prospects. You can say what you like but our society still works like that. Mothers are seen as 'higher risk' employees. A pregnancy may dissuade an employer from hiring and a child might hinder advancement. These are choices that a woman has to consider. The man will NOT be further taxed even if he does become a father. The woman will.
3) Also, this would bring another form of inequality. Bear with me here: I am no not approve of infidelity, but it happens. In the event that it happens, a man's body will never betray him. A woman's will. So let's say the law says a woman has to tell her husband (Not the father, the husband). If he is NOT the father, then she immediately also confesses to infidelity, which can be used against her in court. How far back are we going to take women with this argument????
This choice is indeed between a woman and her body. Noone can have a say in this.
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